Update from Guest Writer

I had a reader, Cissy Davis, write about her past in this blog. I got requests sent to me by email that they wanted to know what has happened since the first post.

To read the initial post, here's the link:

https://bsbgirlforlife.wixsite.com/narrativetherapygirl/single-post/2017/05/19/The-Effects-of-Abuse

Cissy has provided an update for us, and here we go-------

Well I was told that the story I shared the readers wanted to know what has happen since then.

Well in June of 2017, I got my child out of the home. I took him out of state so that he would be safe and not be put in the middle of grown folks stuff. That is what my ex husband has done in the past.

So, in late June 2017, I went and obtained an order of protection from him. I wanted him out my home. I had even type up a contract that he didn’t even follow because he was used to me being weak and probably thought that things would stay the same. But it didn’t. I found my own inner strength and did what I had to do for my safety and the safety of my child.

So once that was done, I was told that I would have a court date. Yet I never received the letter in the mail. And I believe that he lied about the address.

Well anyway, this time I had changed the locks, so he could not get in and he had to be on my time on when to get all his things which by law he had 30 days in which to get it. After court, he came to the apartment like I was going to let him in and I didn’t. He went to the leasing office lying and trying to make a scene and run things, but they shut him down quick. He had to come back the next day and get his belongings which I put in the hallway. And I made sure I wasn’t there. I also changed my number, so I would not get anymore harassing calls, voicemails or texts.

During this time, I was dating a guy long distance. And, at the time, he was another support system of mine. He made me really believe he was the good guy, but he was a wolf in sheep clothing. He pretended to be a man of God but wasn’t, which was messed up. And to add insult to injury, he started talking to my child's paternal grandmother. He showed that he was a f***boy as well. And it also showed what type of female she was. Which is a little girl trap in a grown woman’s body. And after all this I just gave up on love and relationships.

I took time for me to not only heal but grow as a woman and mother. And that’s what I did from August 2017 until now. I feel like and believe God said let me give her an extra blessing because I won over the trials and tribulations that the devil tried to tear me down with.

In December 2017, a guy that I used to work with name Marvin found me on Facebook. We had work together for a few months in Chicago and he was such a gentleman to me. At the time we met, he was with the mother of his child and I was married. But we didn’t cross that boundary. We just develop a strong friendship. He would ride the train with me to downtown Chicago and then sit at the Metra train until my train came. It was just a good friendship. He would give me encouraging words and always told me that I deserve better than what I was dealing with at that time. So, when he found me on Facebook I was in shock and like WOW. From there he would message me and text me throughout the day. To be honest, I just thought he was like the other guys. Basically, trying to sell me a dream and then get the cookies and go. But he wasn’t like that. He called, he text, he video chatted with me from that day to now. He sends me good morning texts and gives me that communication I’ve always wanted and craved.

And in February for Valentines day, we spent alone time together. Just he and I. It was fun and comfortable and everything I wanted. It wasn’t about sex, it was just spending time with each other and laughing and just being ourselves. It was amazing. And to this day we are still together, and he hasn’t changed on me at all. and that’s one of the things I love about him. He also supports me and when I’m having a bad day. I can vent to him and he can do the same. I believe God answered my prayers with him. And we aren’t rushing; we are building a foundation with one another which is something that I have never done. Yet with him it feels good.

Right now, I am in a happy and blessed place and its wonderful.

#love #abuse #survival #relationships